Thursday, April 1, 2010

I'm Sexy

I am sexy.  At least, that is what I heard, again, one Friday night back in February.  I was running by a house when a girl hollers, "Woooowho, Heeey Sexy."  This just confirmed the extraordinary amount of sexiness I must now possess.  My sexiness had to burst through the abundance of clothes I wore; tights, shorts, shirt, jacket, 2 gloves, beanie, hat, and headlamp.  I was running in the middle of the road as a heavy snow was falling with 4-5 inches newly on the ground.  I'll admit that the headlamp probably helped her see my sexiness in the heavy snowfall.

I believe my first discovery of this odd sexiness was more of a conveyance of another's more established sexy power.  It was in May, 1989 and I was only 16, an awkward, some might say puny and thin, young runner.  Some might say I have maintained the puny and thin build.  I had only been running for 6 months, but that strange power had begun to take hold.  There was a group of us Dobson boys out on a midnight run in the nearby town of Elkin.  A car passed and someone hollered, "Hey, it's Sexy Rexy's boys."  That's when I first heard of this sexiness in running.  Rex Mitchell was our Surry Central High School track and cross country coach.  He not only coached, but he ran, all 6'5" in running shorts and shirtless in summer.  He'd become known to some as Sexy Rexy and we were his runners.  

I'm not sure what it is about this sexy mystic that running christens us with.  But with many miles logged on these legs, some just can't resist calling out, "Hey Sexy."  I'm sure many of you running infatuated have experienced the same.  It seems strange that a lean, underfed looking, half-naked person quickly chasing one foot after another could emit such a strong sexiness.  I have even found that some males, who'd swear they're straight, will whistle or holler the "Hey Sexy."  A few years ago, I had a situation where a 73 year old woman commented on my lean body.  She said she was not hitting on me, she was just admiring.  I told her I was dating someone.   Though I've come to understand the overpowering nature of this running sexiness.

I help Sexy Rexy coach at the same high school where he has been passing along this power for more than 30 years.  Now I run with our guys on the local roads.  I must apologize to the new kids each year and tell them they will get used to all the hollering when they run with me.  I also tell them that if they too log many miles, someday people will be unable to control the proclamation of their sexiness.

Our Sexy Cartel
From left to right, Me-jb, Jason Key-JK, Kenny Koves, Joseph Gonzales-JG, Jason Lawrence-JL

All photos are from my senior yearbook.  Even the one of me looking goofy, or maybe SEXY.

No comments:

Post a Comment